Virus Bonhomie!

Technology has brought people together! Don’t lose this opportunity to bond for life long!

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This blog is about a specific group but I have tried to make it as generic as possible. But it applies to all the groups of friends. 

Once upon a time there were a set of retired people and not so retired people, who lived their life, enjoying their golden period. Things were quite good. They were traveling, enjoying with family and had great time with their grandchildren, once in a while. They had illnesses, they had their anxieties but were game at carrying their burden, gracefully. Of course, the children were around but the there was a small issue, they were around the world, for many. Children and their family was a great solace, once in a year or two years, in some cases after five years! There were WhatsApp messages and Video calls, all keeping them very happy in the winter of life. Everything was smooth, children were very caring; they ensured that there were caretakers available round the clock, if needed. Everything was hunky dory! Once in a while there was a cool breeze and warmth of good old friends. This would come out of blue and kept people gasping as they had gone their separate ways in the journey called life. Friends from the old gang, were expected to meet only once in a while. Yes, these folks were also in college once upon a time; had gangs and great friends!  

A few years back suddenly, a species started appearing on horizon! It looked like UFO, nobody initially knew what it was. On searching Google, people came to know it was called Bonhomie! (Oxford meaning of Bonhomie is cheerful friendliness; geniality.) As normally happens, nobody was sure what really was happening. These people realized that there were two naïve folks who were bringing in an unknown creature called Bonhomie in their lives. Thanks to WhatsApp, FB and modern technology in general, things started moving really fast. The group of people was a little confused; they were not aware that they were getting converted into “group of friends, close friends!” The thought itself was breath taking. Am I going to meet my long-lost friends again? Am I going to meet Ashkya, Dhanya, Panya, Dindya, Sharya again after so many years? What fun we had when we were together in college? 

Lists were made, groups were created thanks to technology and two idiots! Phone numbers were shared and, in some cases, photos were exchanged. Calls were made and demeanor of all the people enjoying golden period slowly started changing. People at home were surprised and took some of them to doctors. Doctors said that there is new virus spreading fast, especially in people who are enjoying golden period. There was simply no cure to that. Sometimes these people show signs of Euphoria. But let them be. This virus can actually cure many ailments in that age group. Of course, Bonhomie is not a cure all. It cannot cure cancer, heart attack and stroke! But this virus is an antidote to overcome anxieties created by such illnesses. Anxieties in life, worries in general, feeling of loneliness!  

Finally, the D day arrived for the group to meet! Meet they did at their favourite place near the river! Words like Mithi, Salya, Jadya, Taklya, Lambya were thrown in with gay abandon. There were slaps on the back. There were bear hugs, and of course some tears of joy (which I have even while writing this piece too!) And the party started. There would be formal meets maybe twice in a year. Friends started meeting in small groups; old gangs came together! Bonhomie virus was spreading and parties started in Mumbai too! Small picnics, big parties, idli/dosa at favourite joints was the name of the game.  

As the gang became closer, there started good old fights and skirmishes like those from olden days, as if they were young adults again. The resolution in all the cases was always virtual or sometimes by a phone call. Group magazine started to keep bonding, it died its natural death over a couple of years. Photo albums were created to be shared with all but this also stopped after a period, a natural thing. But after every meet, there was a only one discussion, “When are we meeting again?” And the party continued. Joy was spread among friends regarding achievements of next generations, some of them in studies, some in art, some in painting. Travel photos and experiences were shared and advise taken from others for next holiday.  

Honestly, things were too good to be true! But bonding continued. There was sharing of sorrow due to demise of common friends. There was real enjoyment when some long-lost friend suddenly started meeting again; then a friend started sharing his old passion, paintings. He started getting time for his passion and made everybody’s life all the more enjoyable by sharing his art. Everybody looked forward to his paintings.  

I am all for a healthy world but started getting jittery that our group was traveling in the direction of destroying the virus of Bonhomie. This is one virus that I want to be alive all the time. Google was searched again. Google explained that there was a strong anti-dote, for this virus, called EGO. The group was slowly managing to infuse this anti-dote on a daily basis. Some friends were getting worried, some were overwhelmed. Some were relentlessly doing it. One friend joined only to infuse this dose. Advise of spin doctor was taken. The Doctor said that the virus of Bonhomie remains healthy with a regular dose of a vitamin called communication both verbal and written. The doctor suggested to reduce the communication for some time, to find out if his judgment and treatment suggested was correct.  

Reduction of this vitamin indicated that doctor was right. There were hardly 2/3 friends, who showed interest in checking out if monthly meet was ON! The experiment continues. But the spin doctor also suggested a communication by way of a big write up, which sometimes kick starts the rejuvenation of virus Bonhomie!  

Friends, don’t let this virus die. You will know it’s importance after it goes into coma. Instead of current two idiots, there can be 2/3 additional idiots who will nurture this virus. If not on first Sunday, friends can meet on second Sunday, at a different location, at a different time. Suggest whatever you think will keep the virus kicking! We all have a large stock of anti-dote EGO. Just dispose it off! Throw it away. This is true for all the remaining life of any person young or old, man or woman. Have fun, nurture friendships. God has gifted us three great things. The nature, the family and the friends. You cannot destroy nature because it is self-sustaining and self-correcting. But other need to be handled carefully, they come with a label “Fragile! handle with care”!  

But rest assured that two idiots will not rest till the Bonhomie virus is kicking in again!  

 

Good Old Days!

Whose Good Old Days are better?

This is one term that is frequently used in many conversations. Some use it nostalgically, some use it with heavy heart, some use it as a passing reference. It is the emotion behind it, that is important. All of us have a past as we grow old. Some have 20 years of past, some have 40 years of past and some 60 years of past! Being nostalgic about your “Good Old days” is natural! It is fun, it’s  joy, its pure nostalgia! These are your precious memories which can never be taken away! They open the door to your personal life history, they open the door to the history of the society and the nation, and to the World at that particular time. When we think about “Good Old Days”, we open a small window but how far we are able to see and enjoy, depends totally on our way of looking at things.

Those who enjoy “Good Old days” nostalgically are emotional persons, those who remember “Good Old days” with a heavy heart probably remain grooved in those times. Those who make passing reference of “Good Old days” are not very emotional about life memories. This is of course an observation and I am not commenting what is right and what is the correct way of looking at things. Nor am I passing any judgment! But what really are the “Good Old days”?  

To me “Good Old days” are bygone days. To me today’s times are my “Golden Days”! But the beauty is “Youthful days” of today become “Good Old days” may be 40 or 50 years hence. So, each of “Good Old days” from different decades have their own charm, their own scent, their own beauty! My “Good Old days” are no better or worse than someones “Good Old days”!  

Humans have different ways of looking at life, enjoying life at different age! Each decade probably changes human perception about life, their way of looking at life! In the childhood, life is simply fun and fantasy; it is a time when one leads a very protected life. The entry into adulthood brings out different emotions, exposure to different pleasures and professional studies and sometimes real bad world. Fun is a major part of this growth. Many times, it is more fun than serious things. Generally, “Good Old days” are this phase of life for everybody because they are lively, fun filled and adventurous.  

The current decade, which is Golden Period for me, is going to be “Good Old days” for my grandson Suyash in future. He is in the phase of becoming an adult. He studies hard, he enjoys hard. I am sure he has fun and he has growth pangs. For him travel from US, where he lives, to India, is an adventure. He is now old enough to understand that world is not the same in various different parts. His place of stay at Sammamish near Seattle in the US, is a serene location with lots of trees, lots of water bodies and lots of clouds and a lot of rain. So, when he travels to India, it is lots of noise, lots of people but a lot of family members.  

With modern technology proliferation, the growth of technology in both India and the US is similar and there is not a big chasm between the two places. But chasm in two eras, my “Good Old days” and my golden days is simply breath taking. In my “Good Old days”, Mumbai, where I grew, was a reasonably peaceful big city with a lot of activities. But when I moved to Pune, where I have been living for 50 years, things were drastically different. People would move about on bicycles, using horse driven carriages; whereas in Mumbai there was a fairly modern train system and a bus system. In my “Good Old days”, there were a few major cities like Mumbai, Delhi, Kolkata; other places were towns or villages. Intercity travel was rarity and air travel was non existent. Those were the days of shortages and rationing of food! Eating an apple was considered luxury, the same as owning the car. But I enjoy the memories and nostalgia of “Good Old days”.  

Today Suyash is growing up in the times of plenty of everything. Plenty of money, plenty of gadgets, plenty of cars and plenty of everything in general. With this base, he is growing up with big dreams, and looking forward to even better future. In my “Good Old days”, we also had plenty of dreams and plenty of fun same as Suyash has. But probably, on the scale of 10, my dream size was 3 and Suyash’s dream size could be 7 or 8. So when Suyash becomes nostalgic 40 years hence and yearns for his “Good Old days”, can our “Good Old days” be compared? Answer is both yes and no. No, because the base level at both times are totally different, they simply cannot be compared. Yes, because the nostalgia does not depend on tangibles. So, the base simply does not matter.  

The emotional person can enjoy best of the both worlds and enjoys memories of “Good Old days”; the same person also enjoys today’s good modern, but a bit of hectic times. The person who keeps stuck in “Good Old days”, enjoys in remaining entrapped in those times but is not able to enjoy today’s times. For The less emotional person, nothing really matters.  

When I retrospect about “Good Old days”, I realize that general health and happiness in those times were not so good. Society in general did not have zest or drive as most people used to struggle to survive. My youthful age masked all such struggles, which anyway I did not understand at that time. I am quite sure the “Good Old days” are always the same in every era when intangibles are compared. But when tangibles come in picture, it will be difficult to judge which era would give more joy. I feel that my golden days are better days than “Good Old days”. To me probably, this aspect will keep on improving with time, all the time. In my “Good Old days” we used to have Kaware Ice Cream. Oh, but Baskin Robbins and CCD and Barista today…. You know what I mean! Of course I am nostalgic about Kaware Ice Cream but…… 

Real Life PhD!

What is a PhD? WHat is the proof completing PhD?

A PhD is a degree earned by people who have studied deep and hard after their graduate study or Master’s degree in their own subject. What is a PhD? A Doctor of Philosophy (PhD, Ph.D., DPhil, or Dr. phil.; Latin Philosophiae doctor) is the highest academic degree awarded by universities in most countries. PhD’s are awarded for programs across the whole breadth of academic fields.  

My colleague for more than 20 years, Deepti, once asked me while discussing, about the importance of PhD. I told her that I am not aware as I am not one! But I have personally known some persons who have done their PhD’s in their field and have done brilliant work and contributed to the knowledge big time! Both Jaya and I have done our Master’s in our fields and felt that we understood the engineering much better during these years when did Master’s. Like anything in life, there are brilliant PhD’s, there are good PhD’s and there are run off the mill PhD’s, the last being the major volume. I have recently seen a trend, that when a person becomes well-known in his or her field, people start referring to the person as Dr.! This probably indicates the people’s perception of the knowledge acquired by that person. 

When I read newspapers in Pune (again this activity is getting diminished due to rapid digitization.) I read the large number of list of people earning their PhD’s from Pune University! Have people become brilliant suddenly? Has research activity become major thing in Pune University? I understand that in education field, to become a professor, you must have a PhD as per norms, these days. This to me appears to be the main cause of abundance of people acquiring PhD’s. What are our education standards and research standards? What is the relevance of acquiring degrees? To me this should be done with the purpose of advancement of knowledge and doing research in own field. Later, when one gets experience, these persons should guide more people. All movement is expected to create mushrooms of islands of knowledge.  

Honestly, I don’t see this happening. In the countries like the US, PhD’s really perform the way they are expected to perform and help the society in general, and industry in particular to make rapid strides in development of products, processes, systems and concepts. They help create new things, improve existing things. Their contribution to the society is unbelievable. I am really not sure how far this is true in India. I very rarely hear of industry providing funding to premier education institutions, to develop or improve products, processes. PhD’s are awarded for work that remains more theoretical and how far the theoretical work is useful to the society, is a subject for another PhD.  

I will share a couple anecdotes. People get Fullbright scholarships do some post-doctoral work in premium universities in the world. A person went the prominent university on the west coast in US, under a world-renowned professor, who was a classmate of mine. They had met at a couple of conferences in India. After initial hiccups, things were settling down for the visitor, at least that is what my friend thought. Later on, my friend  tried to help him in various ways but end result was almost nil. My friend asked this gentleman what was his purpose of going to US on this scholarship. At least he was honest. He said, ” My son is trying for education in the US. I wanted to earn dollars for the purpose!” 

In another case I was on a committee in Pune University management school for an event. While having tea during a break, I asked one the professors, about the standard of PhD’s. He smiled wryly! I asked him the reason. He said let me share something with you. ” I was an examiner for a student’s PhD defense. When I got his thesis, I found that the synopsis and the subject content were totally different. So, I informed the concerned professor, the guide, about the error. When I went for the exam, there was no change; I had thought that it was a binding mistake. The synopsis and the subject had no correlation.” When I asked the guide, who was a “renowned” expert and guide from Pune, he simply ignored it!  

Thinking about Deepti’s question, following thoughts came to my mind. Our company has been in the software business. Out of our many clients, four were either Indian giants or global giants who used our product in India. For these projects there were stages. Simplistically, these can be requirement gathering, design and coding, implementation and running the project for years. Final phase would be enhancements and improvements. All this required huge subject knowledge in technical, business processes in auto industry, commercial as well as taxation field.

Deepti, let me assure you with my meager knowledge about PhD, that each stage in our  project was worth a thesis by itself. We have dealt with many aspects in real life, commercial technical, design, implementation strategies and brought them successfully under one umbrella, that is our organization and our team. Deepti, you as a project leader, have done at least one PhD per project if not more. What is the proof of this? Proof is in the Pudding! People have eaten the pudding. The projects have been technically and commercially successful. We have run the business all these years and people have paid us for our products. It is the real-world work, done by all of us together!

What should I call you? You have earned PhD’s given by real life! Dr. Dr. Dr Dr. Deepti? Go ahead fearlessly, with the new path that you have chosen! You have enough PhD’s in your kitty to handle all eventualities! God bless you!  

“Life”, a new take!

This is my narrow interpretation of life!

 

I saw this Marathi song today on you tube. The title of the song is  दमलेल्या बाबाची कहाणी “Damaleya Babachi Kahani”, a story of a tired father! So many thoughts came to my mind while listening to this song. The song was presented by the famous duo, Poet Sandip Khare and Singer Dr. Salil Kulkarni, presenter was Sunil Barve. At the end of the song, there were tears in my eyes and I had very heavy feelings in my heart. I thought that I am a person who can hide his emotions, men folk generally attempt that! That reminded me of the time, when I had gone to see off my daughter, after her marriage, I had the same feelings. Probably all fathers have the same feelings for their daughters, at least I hope so. By the way, this not something against the Sons! But the feelings for sons and daughters have the similar difference like the behavior of “Men who are from Mars, and Women who are from Venus”! They must be giving some different potion to drink on Venus, to make daughters think and act the way they do! 

When your daughter is born, you know that at some stage she is going to get married and go to her husband’s home. Though this is known, the fathers keep on hoping or maybe pretending that this is never going to happen. Slowly the marriage age is reached and “Daddy’s Love” is ready to get married. In the mind, father wants to delay this if it is possible. But at the threshold point, which is the day of marriage, the day of reckoning arises. The father’s mind is in great turmoil, though he is busy in marriage activities. But at the back of his mind, there is a big turmoil going on.  

 The father in the song, is in a somber mood and he remembers that when his daughter needed him to be available to play with her, he has been away in the office. The father says, that he wants the daughter to become young again and fight with him, playfully. He remembers the day when the child was blessed with her first tooth, he remembers how she crawled all over their home and took control of everything, including their minds. He then asks her a question, “Will you please remember me, when you get married and go? Will you shed a few tears while going away? ” The song simply overwhelms your mind! It is also beautifully rendered in a modern way!  

Such situations do arise in many facets of our lives. The situation can be with mixed feelings, when we move to another city after a long stay, or we complete our studies and move out of hostels after 5/6 years of stay with friends. It can be when you retire after a long innings. In all these scenarios, some very close relationships relationships are formed. Sometimes, them become extended families. I feel that a daughter is father’s “Life”; similarly your work, you career, is also your “Life” if you have worked at only one place in your life time. Cutting off from both “Lives” is equally painful!  

In my life, I have seen only seen one person retire, that too twice! I watched it from close as I am talking about Jaya, my wife. Years back she retired from a Government research institute. She had taken voluntary retirement, and after a small break, she had plans ready for her future. For her it was kind of transit retirement. I could see that she was both happy and sad with the retirement. Sad that so many years of association with many people was going to break, a few had become life time friends. As she had future plans, she was able manage the transition quite well. Second time when she retired, she “really retired” from work in the industry. But our granddaughter’s arrival and my health issue did not give her time to get the feel of the new phase. We kept her so busy for first 8/9 months, that she did not have time to enjoy the change or feel the vacuum, retrospect or get the feel of real retirement. When she retired, our life pattern had changed so much, that she had to really juggle & struggle her time to manage life.  

I felt that there are quite a few similarities in one’s daughter getting married and the retirement from work life. In both cases, you have spent quality time with your daughter and as well as at your work. Some people get involved a lot in their work, sometimes forgetting everything else in life. Such people, I am sure will find it tough to adjust to retired life. Maybe those are the people on whom the song is based!  

Friends, it is quite tricky to decide which is more difficult from the two inevitable things that are going to happen! Giving away your first “Life”, your daughter or the second “Life” when you retire from your career! I have already, done the tough one so probably when time comes for me to retire, I hope to handle it more deftly! How you about you folks? 

Flora and Humans in Karve Nagar!

Reminiscing old Pune via Karve Nagar!

I used to go for my morning walks at 5.30 am. Now I have kept the timing flexible and go out a little later after 6.45. Why did I change the timings? Cooler weather, though I like it, has been giving me a bit of trouble as I get some issues with my throat. Hence, I thought this could be the better timing. And Lo! I enjoy my walks at these times too! Each slot probably has its own charm and cannot be compared. The almost zero traffic, skies just starting to lose the darkness, has its own beauty. In winter, the chill, and darkness create their own zone. But then beautiful rising Sun with crisp wind also adds to charm.

Another advantage I see is that one can actually see the expressions on the faces of people walking at that time. I don’t smile at everybody on purpose but I am lucky to have a smiling demeanor, maybe! I see all the possible combinations of facial expressions in this world. I really want to catch all these expressions on the camera but it is not a practical thing to do! One couple, maybe in late fifties always has the lady giving a bit of sermon to her husband every day. They should make a pact that the sermons should stop at the gate of their home. Maybe they do not get that freedom at home or maybe fresh air induces more energy in the sermon! I see a very senior citizen with worry lines on forehead. I hope that it is his demeanor and not the real worries! Young folks of course are walking briskly but are in their own world, ear buds and all! Once I spoke to one of them while she was adjusting the ear buds. I jokingly asked her, when there are such lovely sounds of birds chirping, why the earbuds! Her expression either said, look at the stupid guy or what is he talking about!   

Karve Nagar has beautiful flowery trees and shady trees! It is the area where I currently live in Pune.

Certain areas are just amazing with their collection of flora! With current easy availability of cameras in cell phones, I am enjoying taking photos which I am sharing with you. Around 30 years back, this area was comparatively undeveloped. The major bridge in that area, called Rajaram Pul has come into existence in last fifteen years. This bridge has changed the traffic pattern of this area from sleepy area to a bustling area. One thing for sure, during development of this area the fauna in this area was reasonably well retained, however the types have changed. This area had orchards of Guava for miles together and some Mango orchards too. These were private plantations and later on became housing colonies. But while developing the colonies, authorities as well as individuals have tried to keep the area as green as possible, it has also become colourful due to certain trees, especially Bahawas. Somehow, I have not found many of Gulmohars, though they are around. The abundance of trees is easily reflected when we come home in the evening. There is marked difference in temperature, of at least a couple of degrees Centigrade, when we take a turn towards the colonies from the main road.  This is happens as there are natural welcome arches formed on the roads, by the trees!

Coming back to humans, this area is now reminiscent of Sadashiv Peth and Narayan Peth of olden days. I understand that many people in those areas moved to Karve Nagar area when the wadas in the old Peths (Localities) got developed in to new buildings. I can see typical Maharashtrian products available in small joints in this area. For example, Thalipith, Sanja, Shira, Danyache Ladu and so on. In summer we see many vendors selling Mogra flowers and Gajare, a typical Maharashtrian love! Ladies adorn these Gajaras and will share them with other ladies when they visit them!  

This area has developed well, over a period of time but is not modern in the sense of many skyscrapers, malls. A major lane here and there bustles with Pizza Huts, Star Bucks and Pumas of this world. But preferred joints will still be Wada Pav and Pohe, Cutting chai and Bata! Preferred Ice cream will still be Local Ice cream to Baskin Robbins and the local parlors selling fresh juice. This area also has a nice set of bungalows but is has more of apartment complexes built in 80’s and 90’s. Though we see a few Mercedes’s and BMW’s, there more Nanos, Alto’s and two Wheelers which are called in local lingo, Gadi! A motorcycle or a scooter or a moped is always referred to as Gadi.

Karve Nagar area reminds me of the Old Pune of 60’s and 70’s with a slightly modern touch; so naturally it takes me back to days of my youth! Let us see if there is any other “Old Pune” coming up “New Pune”! Or maybe that phase, old Pune, may have become History and we will see only NEW, “New Pune” in future!

 

 

सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते! Beloved in my dreams!

Trying to share my feelings about a lovely song!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWFDNTBGCro 

I am sharing this song with you as this one is rare and my favourite! This is a Lata Madan combo!

 सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते एक याद रही एक भूल गये,  

सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते 

एक रात मिलनकी आयी थी और उसके बाद जुदाई थी  

गम और ख़ुशी की दो राते  

गम और ख़ुशी की दो राते  एक याद रही एक भूल गये,  

सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते 

 

एक सावन की रुत लायी झुले, दुजी में सजन हम को भुले  

देखी हैं यही दो बारसातें, एक याद रही एक भूल गये  

सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते 

 

एक रोज तुम्हे दिल दे बैठे, फिर रोग बिरह का ले बैठे  

ये प्यार की हैं दो सौगाते, एक याद रही एक भूल गये  

सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते एक याद रही एक भूल गये,  

सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते 

Many  a  times,  I  have heard  people  talking  about  Hindi  Film  songs  in  two  extreme  emotions.  Hindi film songs are  either described in  derogatory manner   or  they  are treated as  gift  from  God.  Likes  and  dislikes  about  songs  is  individual  choice.  So  these  reactions  are  understandable. Recently I have started going into details of understanding of the meaning implied in the songs. Some the lyricists have been legends and the songs they have written are phenomenal. Of course, many times it so happens that the songs are just inserted for TRP, maybe as good as on public demand. Here I am not  writing about this aspect of Hindi film songs. 

This song is from the movie “Gateway Of India” It is a 1957 movie, singer Lata Mangeshkar, Madan Mohan’s music and the lyricist is Rajinder Krishan. Song is picturised on Madhubala. This song is a typical Lata-Madan combination. 

You are swayed by enchanting romance, moods of dejection and a feel of refinement when you listen to any of the songs by these greats. Both had a great chemistry together, which helped them highlight the female protagonist of Hindi movies through some soothing Ghazals.. 

The wordings of this song are very simple, with no fancy words, no Urdu jaban, but the song  talks beautifully about life’s philosophy. सपने मे सजनसे दो बाते  is  the  refrain from the song and has been used beautifully. (Refrains are the lines repeated in a song) This song talks of the expression of thoughts by the lover about her beloved, in her dreams. This thought itself gives mystical dimension to the song. The lover is saying that, ” I  spoke  with my  beloved  about  two  things  but  I  remember  only one  but  I  forgot  the  other.”  She  is so involved  in  her  love  that  has  become  forgetful. The  night  they met was  followed  by  separation.  This  is  typically  sadness  followed  by  joy  in  our  life.  Come  to  think  of  it,  if  only  joy  or  sadness  existed  in  our  life,  we  won’t  really  feel  the  other.  Joy  exists  because  there  is  sadness,  sorrow!  What  we  need  in  life  is  change.  What  state  we  are  in  and  what  events  will  happen  in  our  life  is  destiny  and  we  can  not  control  it. This interchange of joy and sorrow brings back our sanity.

In  the  next  stanza  the  lyricist  takes  this  to  a  new  height. In  the  hindu  month  of  Shravan  there  is  tradition  to  tie  swings  to  the  trees  to enjoy  the  arrival  of  rains. The  rains  also  help  us  in  our  fields  and  brings  water  to  the  drying  rivers.  The  first  smell  of  the  rain  drops  falling  on  the  heated  soil  is  the  same  joy  that  we  all  feel.  But  as  the usual cycle  is,  joy is  to  be  followed  by  sorrow! With second shower my beloved has forgotten me! Cycle of joy and sorrow continues.  It follows the same pattern of feeling of joy and forgetting sorrow.  

The lover finally says, my beloved I gave you my heart on a platter with joy but I never knew that I will be caught in the sorrow of separation. It was my joy to give you heart my beloved but never knew that separation will be like a disease. These contrasting feelings are part of our life but get highlighted between lovers as the emotions are very high. 

The sorrow of separation and joy of togetherness has been beautifully used to explain our life. This can be between mother and child, two friends, or your separation with your pets! In any relationship this is bound to happen. Rajinder Kishan has given this superb song in which is very simple but at the same time full of meaning.  

This song is rarely heard on radio/tv and I was lucky to see Lata sing this song live, in late 70’s on DD Srinagar. I was simply struck by the simplicity and beauty of this song. I had to wait for the advent of internet  to get this song. Who am I to talk of the virtuoso duo of Lata and Madan? They are legends and they give us joy. The joy they give us, helps us overcome different sorrows that come in our lives. There are many such combinations like Lata/Madan in our Hindi movies. Hope I am able to share a few more combinations with beautiful and meaningful songs with you.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

                                                                                     

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

                                                                                     

Sridevi Meri Chandani!

Sridevi, a natural, who just clicked on when she came in front of a Camera!

24th Feb 2018 was a shocking date for all us film lovers when Hawa Hawaein lady Sridevi passed! It looks like HE likes all beautiful people and decides to take them away early. Sridevi was just 54, very young by today’s standards when she died. She had just started her second innings. Madhubala died at the age of 39 and Marilyn Monroe at the age of 36! In case of Madhubala at least her health issue was known to the close ones, Marilyn was veering towards her death but in case of Sridevi there were no known issues; her sudden passing was all the more shocking to everybody!

She started acting in the film industry at the tender age of 4; so, she was in the industry for 50 years! That is a very long time to be in any field and I am sure that she must have been doing her work on auto pilot! She was a beauty, she was a fantastic dancer in classical mold and a terrific actor. People always talk of her dancing prowess but I feel that her acting prowess was even better! The classic example of this, is the film Sadma. In this movie, she is a modern young lady who loses her memory due to retrograde amnesia, following an accident. Her mental age becomes 6 or 7. She goes through a horrible phase in her life as she is pushed into prostitution. Kamal Hassan meets her in a brothel and realizes that she has been cheated to go into prostitution. He takes her away and nurtures her back to life; a doctor finally is able to cure her and she becomes original modern girl. After this change she simply does not remember Hassan, as her amnesia is cured! Life goes on! Her acting in this movie is seen to be believed. Behaving like a 6/7-year-old girl is not easy when you are a normal person! She was nominated for film fare best actress award. She won a lot of critical acclaim for her role! This gem of a song, from the movie Sadma, “Ae Zindagi” is to me the best song picturized on her, ever! Suresh Wadkar, the singer, is also at his best in the song! Did she enjoy her childhood in this song, as she may have missed the real one?

Public life has it pluses while going is good, but when things turn up differently it is really nasty, what with our TV shows, newspapers, WhatsApp and FB! People in general and reporters and commentators in particular forget that the celebrity is normal human being like you and me. They have their family, husband or wife, children like all human beings have. When stupid and nasty things are mentioned, poor jokes are circulated, they forget that they are troubling a family and a group of friends; it was a heart wrenching experience to see this tamasha. When celebrities are alive they can ignore, smile and sometimes rebut! But when Sridevi died it was pointless to discuss everything threadbare. There was that unfortunate change in the reason for death, found in autopsy. This took the rumour mongering to crescendo! Naturally, I do not want to go into details but I have the usual questions why, why and why? Why get into this mode? Why discuss threadbare unnecessary details? Why not let the family be, in their sorrow? Everybody simply forgot that someone had died.

Sreedevi Boney Kapoor Ayyapan was born in a Tamil orthodox family. She started working at the age of 4! When you start working at that age, I am sure that you never have a normal childhood; again, I am not going into details. According to Ram Gopal Varma, she became penniless when her father, who looked after her finances, died because he trusted wrong people with money. Later her mother made wrong investments and she became penniless the second time. When her mother died, Sridevi’s own sister cheated and looted her money! She finally got her solace in Boney Kapoor! I am sure that also must have been a tough call for her because she became his second wife. How much can a person take in a life time, I really don’t know. Even he her death, there was no peace but a great turmoil for her family!

We only look at the glamorous side amongst lovely people, beautiful dresses, going to exotic locations, traveling all over the world. According to Ram Gopal Varma she had a fantastic ability to switchover, once she was in front of the camera. Probably films was the only thing that gave her peace!  She turned into a different persona! Her eyes would sparkle and feet would start dancing to rhythm and what rhythm she had, what expressions she had, what flexibility she had! She had a tough time when she moved from South to Hindi movies because at that time she was not at all proficient in both Hindi and English. It was not rose petals all the way in Mumbai but she came up with sheer talent, hard work and brilliance of her performances! She became the first lady super star of Hindi movies.

Who would want to die at prime and a young age of 54! At this stage now people start new companies, new projects! Sridevi had started he second innings with a fantastic performance in a movie called English Winglish! She looked so natural all through the movie, it felt as if the role was written specifically, for her! She had kept herself perfectly fit in real life by way of exercise and diet. There are murmurs going around that she had gone through many surgeries; this beautification is probably need of the profession, and people do like to look beautiful and young all the time. People dye their hair suitably, they follow various anti-aging regimens which include procedures and surgeries, some of them can be risky. But Sridevi’s death was not because of this; she somehow fainted and died!

There is a turmoil going on in my mind, after I read about her cremation; but I will be a little selfish and say that my last memories of her will always be beautiful, bubbly Chandani! How can Madhubala and Monroe and  Sridevi be 80! Who knows she could look beautiful even at 80 but I will surely not be around! In our younger age we had Waheeda Rahaman, Sharmila Tagore who have kept themselves very graceful at their current ages 80 and 71 respectively. But not all manage this!

So what is my favourite memory of Sridevi? There are so many dances, performances, expressions, it is impossible to choose! I will give her 9 on 10 for everything or maybe 9.5 but I will give HIM 10 on 10 for his decision to take her away! What a selfish decision. He made a surprise move to have her back with Him! Perfect 10 on 10, bhagwan! Tusi great ho! Teri Lila agadh hai!

With moist eyes, and heavy heart! Alvida Sridevi!