In life, we find that some people always make progress, move ahead in life. But others keep on repeating the same mistakes and get stalled in life. Why does this happen? There is no clearcut answer for this. The main reason for this could be their approach to life, the way they try to solve the problems; it is about their mindset. The more successful people have an open mind, whereas those who don’t do well have a closed mind.
Open minded people have the willingness to learn and are not afraid to accept that they have gone wrong. Those with a closed mindset never want to admit that they have gone wrong; they will fight tooth and nail to prove how they are right. Ultimately, your approach to handle problems defines success or failure in life. In fact, the problem starts with closed minded people putting up a show that they are open-minded. This non-acceptance is dangerous.
Having the courage to accept that you are wrong is a good beginning. The progress graph slope depends on your ability to accept new ideas, especially the ideas which you do not prefer.
Typically, a closed-minded person does not like his ideas challenged by someone. Such people cannot accept the fact that others may have better ideas, different ideas which need to be considered. These persons are not amused when someone asks them a question. The closed-minded person will never ask a question about someone’s idea, he will just make a statement to the effect, I don’t agree, or I don’t like it. The open-minded person will ask a question about new ideas. Why do you think it is a great idea? Can we do it slightly differently so that your concept becomes even a better idea? Such questions indicate that open-minded person is basically ok with the idea, but a few points are not clear to him. Maybe there is another way of looking at the concept which you might have missed. The person wants to contribute, and the question makes you think a little more. Such queries can lead to a better conclusion on the subject. It will lead to bringing different viewpoints forward. Finally, such arguments, questioning could lead to the concept of agreeing to disagree! Such conclusions are always drawn after healthy discussions.
The thought process brings us to a discussion on questions and statement. A statement indicates one track mind. I want to do this in the following manner, whereas the query means the thought process, of being open to the idea and trying to get into the depth of understanding the concept better. It also indicates that the open-minded person is accepting the fact that others can be smarter than them. Like closed-minded people, they don’t think that they are the best! Open-minded persons always have a curiosity about how others feel.
People’s default behaviour offers quick information about them. When you disagree with someone, what’s their reaction? If they’re ready to rephrase what they just said or, even worse, repeat it, then they are assuming that you don’t understand them, rather than that you disagree with them. They have that superiority complex. Open-minded people will see through other people’s eyes, they will consider other people’s viewpoint. When you disagree with an open-minded person, they are quick to assume that they might have misunderstood something and ask you to tell them where their understanding is incomplete.
Close-minded people react with, “I may be wrong, but here is what I think.” This statement is trying to mask that you are close-minded. An open-minded person will put things differently. He will say, “I may be wrong, but why do you do it this way? Can you elaborate further so that my understanding will be better.” He comes up with a question and not a statement.
A close-minded person does not like to hear any voice other than his own. He will block others from speaking. He does not like the idea that he has to rephrase what he said and explain again in more details. The open-minded person will say, “Hey, friend! Why don’t you say something? I have put an idea which I think may be useful, but your suggestions will take care of points which I may have missed, or I may not have even thought of those points.”
I read an interesting theory on the net. The method says that the close-minded person uses an analogy that at the end of the day, only one sperm meets the egg to create life. Once this meeting takes place, the egg shuts off its system. No further sperms are allowed. But the open-minded person has a mind and a thought process where many ideas and concepts are accommodated, merged and tried leading to a far superior solution. His mind will think of these many ideas back and forth before finally concluding.
One thing the close-minded person does not have is humility. When humility is absent from your persona, one becomes close-minded. Where is humility hidden? It comes out from accepting your failure, recognising that you have made errors of assessment. Acceptance can never happen when you have a closed mind. Most important is that you do not have to worry about being close-minded. You have plenty of company. But do you want to change it? Do you want to become a better version of yourself? It is doable, and you need to work on it. It does not happen by accident.
Being open-minded does not mean that you spend an excessive amount of time considering patently bad ideas just for the sake of open-mindedness.
If someone offers you a freebie, be sceptical. There is no free lunch in life. If someone tells you that he has found a technique so that humans can fly, ignore him. If someone comes to you with a brilliant idea to cheat people or government by fraudulent schemes, close your mind. Being close-minded in such cases is the right thing to do.
When you find yourself exhibiting these behaviours at any moment, acknowledge what’s happening and correct it. Don’t blame yourself. As soon as you can, find a quiet place and reflect on what’s going on at a deeper level. Try to do better next time. Remember that this stuff takes efforts.
Friends, ultimately everything boils down to the company you keep. Everybody has a mentor in life and selecting a good one is a great beginning. If close-minded people surround you, you will have to work hard to remain open minded. But if you are close-minded, don’t fret, take efforts. You can change yourself provided you want to change. Things are not on auto-pilot; you need to work hard for it. Don’t worry; it is doable!